FINAL SCOREBOARD

 1) Team Greg  299

2) Team David  250.5

3) Team Patrick  208.5

4) Team Chip  155

5) Team JD  143

Greg Congrats! Money coming soon - and a brand new trophy on the way.

The Bad Guys Won

Jeremiah the Great: Team JD's Jeremiah Smith celebrates in style

 

College Football Playoff Championship:

Ohio State 34, Notre Dame 23

The Buckeyes were on the warpath after a slow first quarter with a three-touchdown burst in the second for a 21-7 halftime lead. 

OSU went up 31-7 midway in the third before Notre Dame put together a couple scoring drives. But the Buckeyes were just playing with their food and shut down any comeback dreams soon after.

The main story? Team Greg's OSU gambit paid off big-time! It was a banner day for the scarlet and gray but just Greg's QB Will Howard (20.5 points) and RB Quinshon Judkins (a game-high 30) combined for 50 just by themselves.

For Notre Dame Team Dave QB Riley Leonard had a game, with 29 points but the plethora of OSU weapons were just too much.

Scoring

OSU RB Quinshon Judkins (Greg) 30

ND QB Riley Leonard (Dave) 29

OSU QB Will Howard (Greg) 20.5

OSU WR Jeremiah Smith (JD) 14

OSU WR Emeka Egbuka (Chip) 7

ND WR Beaux Collins (Greg) 5

OSU RB Treyvonne Henderson (Greg) 4

OSU WR Carnell Tate (Chip) 3

ND RB Jeremiyah Love (Chip) 2

"You hear that Ohio State fight song? That is the sound of inevitability ..."

 

College Football Playoffs Scoreboard

There's no point fighting it, we are in the Buckeyes' Matrix - and Notre Dame's Marcus Freeman is not Neo (sadly).

Speaking of inevitability, allow me to introduce Team Greg, who has ridden his adoptive Buckeyes to the mountaintop. 

In this new format, loading up with one or two teams can bring glory - or peril. This roll of the dice turned into a CODE: Red (for the rest of us).

Without further ado, here's the scores heading into Monday's championship:

1) Team Greg 239.5 with 5 players left

2) Team David 221.5 with 1 left

3) Team Patrick 208.5 with 0 left

4) Team Chip 143 with 2 left

5) Team JD 129 with 1 left

Jack-off: Ohio State's Jack Sawyer celebrates the Texas demise.

Ohio State of Emergency

OSU RB Quinshon Judkins (Team Greg) hits the R1 button.

College Football Playoff Semifinals:

Ohio State 28, Texas 14

For the second straight time, the semifinals gave us a classic - even though this one was closer than the final score might indicate.

"Give us an inch - and we'll defend it." - OSU's Jack Sawyer.

With Texas threatening to score the tying touchdown a strip sack defensive TD put the Longhorns away and sent OSU to the championship.

The Texas defense held the Buckeye offensive stars in check but alas, couldn't A) cover a screen pass and B) didn't have enough firepower to get over the hump - especially with WR Matthew Golden injured and sidelined most of the game.

Buckeyes running backs led the scoring with Team Greg RBs Treyvonne Henderson (17) and Quinshon Judkins (17) each doing damage.

Scoring

OSU RB Treyvonne Henderson (Greg) 17 points

OSU RB Quinshon Judkins (Greg) 17

OSU QB Will Howard (Greg) 14.5

OSU WR Carnell Tate (Chip) 8 

Texas RB Tre Wisner (Dave) 8

OSU WR Emeka Egbuka (Chip) 5

Texas WR Matthew Golden (Greg) 5

Texas TE Gunnar Helm (Dave) 4

Texas WR DeAndre Moore (Patrick) 3

Texas WR Ryan Wingo (Patrick) 2

OSU WR Jeremiah Smith (JD) 0

Ass over tea kettle: Texas RB Tre Wisner (Team Dave) gets chopped down. 

Scoreboard!

 

These are the scores heading into Friday's second semifinal 

(see above for a preview)

Team David  209.5 with 3 left

Team Patrick 203.5 with 2 left

Team Greg 186 with 5 left

Team Chip 130.5 with 3 left

Team JD 129 with 1 left

St. Nicholas (Singleton) delivers; ND stays golden

        `Nicholas Singleton scores one of his three touchdowns (with extreme prejudice).  

College Football Playoff Semifinals:

Notre Dame 27, Penn State 24 

A three-quarter rock fight broke out into a freewheeling fourth quarter at the Orange Bowl.

Tied 10-10 after three quarters, both Penn State and Notre Dame combined for 31 points in the fourth, alone. 

In the end, the better QB-Coach combination pulled out the win, thanks in part to a dreadful INT by Drew Allar.

PSU RB Nicholas Singleton (Team Patrick) was a beast, scoring a game-high 29 points helped by a TD hat trick, while ND QB Riley Leonard added 20.5 with one score passing and one rushing.

The Life of Reilly (Leonard).

Straight Trash

And a special and hearty F-YOU goes out to the "receivers" who played in this game as not one, but three owned players posted lovely SCORELESS outings. 

You know announcers are just being kind when they talk about them as if they're just "mid." Nope.

I can't wait to watch you guys never again, none of you are good enough for the UFL.

Scoring

PSU RB Nicholas Singleton (Patrick) 29 points 

ND QB Riley Leonard (Dave) 20.5

ND RB Jeremiyah Love (Chip) 11

PSU TE Tyler Warren (Patrick) 9

PSU RB Kaytron Allen (Patrick) 8

PSU WR Omari Evans (Patrick) 0

PSU WR Harrison Wallace (Dave) 0

ND WR Beaux Collins (Greg) 0

RIP, Penn State Nittany  Lionesses

Upcoming Schedule

 Hello gentlemen, here are the remaining games: 

Points

1 Team David - 189 points with 4 remaining players

QB Riley Leonard, Notre Dame 20.5 / 15 / 35.5 points

RB Tre Wisner, Texas 23 / 8 / 31 points

WR Harrison Wallace III, Penn St. 4 / 3 / 7 points

TE Gunnar Helm, Texas 13 / 11 / 24 points

Team Dave's TE Gunnar Helm

2 Team Greg - 186 with 5 remaining players

QB Will Howard, Ohio St. 21.5 / 22.5 / 44 points

RB Quinshon Judkins, Ohio St. 16 / 8 / 24 points

RB Trevyonne Henderson, Ohio St. 25 / 23 / 48 points

WR Matthew Golden, Texas 4 / 22 / 26 points

WR Beaux Collins, Notre Dame 7 points

Team Greg QB Will Howard talks $hit

3 Team Patrick - 152 with 7 remaining players

QB Drew Allar, Penn St. 5.5 / 18 / 23.5 points

RB Nick Singleton, Penn St. 15 / 14 / 29 points

RB Kaytron Allen, Penn St. 21 / 13 / 34 points

WR Omari Evans, Penn St. 0 / 11 / 11 points

WR DeAndre Moore, Texas 0 / 8 / 8 points

WR Ryan Wingo, Texas 3 / 3 / 6 points

TE Tyler Warren, Penn St. 3 / 18 / 21 points

Team Patrick RB Kaytron Allen does the Heisman pose, for real.

4 Team JD - 129 with 1 remaining player

WR Jeremiah Smith, Ohio St. 24 / 30 / 54 points

Team JD WR Jeremiah Smith strikes a pretty pose while dominating

5 Team Chip - 119.5 with 3 remaining players

RB Jeremiyah Love, Notre Dame 18 / 2 / 20 points

WR Emeka Egbuka, Ohio St. 8 / 13 / 21 points

WR Carnell Tate, Ohio St. 1 / 1 / 2 points

Team Chip RB Jeremiyah Love found the sledding tough against Georgia.

PJ Fleck gets the mayo

We mocked him years ago for being "Coach Bro." Now his Golden Gophers have won the Duke's Mayo Bowl and he received his just desserts.

Late last week we got to see one of the proudest traditions in bowl comedy - and Fleck really is built for this.

Enjoy the spectacle below:

PJ Fleck was built for this moment.pic.twitter.com/854qnwZKk5

— Tom Fornelli (@TomFornelli) January 4, 2025

SCOREBOARD!

The Golden Child: Matthew Golden, y'all

 

Points

1 Team David - 189 points with 4 remaining players

2 Team Greg - 186 with 5 remaining players

3 Team Patrick - 152 with 7 remaining players

4 Team JD - 129 with 1 remaining player

5 Team Chip - 119.5 with 3 remaining players

Rosters

* = Still playing

Team David 189 with 4 left

*QB Riley Leonard, Notre Dame 20.5 / 15 / 35.5 points

QB Cade Klubnik, Clemson 24 points

RB Ashton Jeanty, Boise St. 12 points

RB Cam Skattebo, Arizona St. 43.5 points

*RB Tre Wisner, Texas 23 / 8 / 31 points

WR Donte' Thornton, Jr., Tenn  1 point

WR Dominic Lovett, Georgia 3 points

WR Elijah Sarratt, Indiana 8 points

*WR Harrison Wallace III, Penn St. 4 / 3 / 7 points

*TE Gunnar Helm, Texas 13 / 11 / 24 points

Team Greg 186 with 5 left

*QB Will Howard, Ohio St. 21.5 / 22.5 / 44 points

QB Sam Leavitt, Arizona St. 14 points

RB Jordan James, Oregon 2 points

*RB Quinshon Judkins, Ohio St. 16 / 8 / 24 points

*RB Trevyonne Henderson, Ohio St. 25 / 23 / 48 points

*WR Matthew Golden, Texas 4 / 22 / 26 points

WR Arian Smith, Georgia 6 points

*WR Beaux Collins, Notre Dame 7 points

WR Omar Cooper, Ind. 8 points

TE Terrance Ferguson, Oregon 7 points

Team Patrick 152 with 7 left

QB Gunner Stockton, Georgia 10.5 points

*QB Drew Allar, Penn St. 5.5 / 18 / 23.5 points

*RB Nick Singleton, Penn St. 15 / 14 / 29 points

RB Trevor Etienne, Georgia 6 points

*RB Kaytron Allen, Penn St. 21 / 13 / 34 points

*WR Omari Evans, Penn St. 0 / 11 / 11 points

WR Dillon Bell, Georgia 3 points

*WR DeAndre Moore, Texas 0 / 8 / 8 points

*WR Ryan Wingo, Texas 3 / 3 / 6 points

*TE Tyler Warren, Penn St. 3 / 18 / 21 points

Team JD 129 with 1 left

QB Dillon Gabriel, Oregon 16.5 points

QB Kurtis Rourke, Indiana 16.5 points

RB Dylan Sampson, Tenn. 0 points

RB Justice Ellison, Indiana 4 points

RB Phil Mafah, Clemson 2 points

*WR Jeremiah Smith, Ohio St. 24 / 30 / 54 points

WR Tez Johnson, Oregon 3 points

WR Cameron Camper, Boise St. 6 points

WR Rodrick Daniels, SMU 12 points

TE Matt Lauter, Boise St. 15 points

Team Chip 119.5 with 3 left

QB Kevin Jennings, SMU 8 points

QB Maddux Madsen, Boise St. 14.5 points

RB Brashard Smith, SMU 8 points

*RB Jeremiyah Love, Notre Dame 18 / 2 / 20 points

RB Ty Son Lawton, Indiana 4 points

*WR Emeka Egbuka, Ohio St. 8 / 13 / 21 points

WR Antonio Williams, Clemson 12 points

WR Traeshon Holden, Oregon 23 points

*WR Carnell Tate, Ohio St. 1 / 1 / 2 points

TE Jake Briningstool, Clemson 6 points

Play(ed) Like A Champion Today

USA. USA. USA.

 College Football Playoff Quarterfinals:

Notre Dame 23, Georgia 10

Notre Dame's field entrance was epic (although ESPN skipped showing that for the broadcast, as well as the moment of silence and the National Anthem after um, just a deadly terror attack). Once the game began, then the Irish got to work on the CFP's upset of the tourney.

Leonard Part VI: ND's QB mostly ran.

 

Sure the offensive production was, at times, gross - but ND found just enough to upend UGA playing with a backup QB leaving the 'Dawgs with a bittersweet Sugar Bowl taste. 

Points were tough to come by, but Irish QB Riley Leonard (Dave) emerged with a high score of 15 in the defensive affair. 

Jeremiyah Love (Chip) was another of the shutdown offensive victims one game after blasting Indiana in round 1.

 Georgia's run game was stymied and its passing attempts featured plenty of  drops and missed opportunities - whenever Georgia QB Gunner Stockton (Pat) wasn't being molested by shiny gold helmets from a fierce pass rush. It also included a bench penalty for tripping a ref by a shlumpy white reserve cornerback in street clothes! 

A Georgia player, Parker Jones, not even suited up gets called for a penalty for the referee running into him 🤦‍♂️ pic.twitter.com/izbhpTTbuW

— Trey Wallace (@TreyWallace_) January 2, 2025

Scoring 

'Dawg-walked: Gunner Stockton hits the deck

ND QB Riley Leonard (Dave) 15 points

UGA QB Gunner Stockton (Pat) 10.5

ND WR Beaux Collins (Greg) 7

UGA RB Trevor Etienne (Pat) 6

UGA WR Arian Smith (Greg) 6

UGA WR Dillon Bell (Pat) 3

UGA WR Dominic Lovett (Dave) 3

ND RB Jeremiyah Love (Chip) 2

Cheerleading 'Dawg-y style'